Raffi loved perching on the window seat of The Lucky Penny to watch the birds outside or the people inside. Small cat. Big personality.
It is with a heavy heart that I must tell all his other adoring fans that Raffiel “Raffi” Bernini Menard* crossed the rainbow bridge two weeks ago on Monday, June 16th. He was 19 years and one month old, which is 93 years old in human years. It was a long, full, adventurous, and snuggly life and I couldn’t have asked for more!
Raffi deserves this post because he was my nearly constant companion for over 19 years and many of you knew and loved him, too. Or at least thought he was pretty okay - for a cat.
The tansu of the Lucky Penny made an acceptable perch, too, especially when the sunflowers were attracting birds and butterflies for his viewing pleasure.
I was in Walla Walla for three days the weekend before, turning over Valencia Cottage for new tenants. And I’m so darn glad that Raffi hung in there for me to come home, so I could be there for his passing. I knew when he didn’t get up to greet me as he always does, and when he didn’t immediately start to purr when I scooped him up, that he was in his final hours. I snuggled him and told him what a good kitty he was, how much I loved him, how grateful I was that he had shared his sweet little spirit with me and so many other people. I knew it was his time and told him it was okay for him to go.
Raffi’s favorite spot int the world was inside my vest (but anyone else’s jacket/coat/hoodie was an acceptable alternative). This photo was taken about a month ago on his 19th birthday.
Raffi passed snuggled up in my vest, his favorite place in the world. It has been really endearing the past couple of weeks, as I’ve told people about Raffi’s passing, how many of them have sent me pictures of him. And how many of those pictures have been of him tucked into their vest/coat/jacket/hoodie like a little kangaroo, which is how he earned his most enduring nickname, Roo.
Raffi was a great explorer, always eager to see what was around the corner. Or inside the box.
I believe that like so many other companion animals, Raffi’s sole purpose in life was to spread love unconditionally. It’s uncanny how many people over the years have confessed to me “Ya know, I don’t really like cats. But I like Raffi!” He had that effect on people. He didn’t know he was a cat. The thought he was a dog, or a monkey, or maybe a human. But he converted people all over the place to the notion that it was okay to love cats (or maybe just Raffi) because he was such a lover himself.
Raffi was expert at finding the patch of sunshine - and following it as it moved! Unless, of course, he tuckered out and then woke up in a shadow.
There is no way I could tell the whole story of Raffi’s life here on the blog. Nor would the obituary of a cat matter as much to anyone else as it does to HIs Person. But I’m glad I took the time to tell that story aloud, through tears, with Raffi’s little cardboard casket on the front passenger seat of the car, while I was driving through the rainy, misty, green Gorge, back to Walla Walla last weekend, to lay him to rest. It took me over 2 hours to just to tell our story aloud.
Raffi loved being wherever his people were. And all people were his people. So this him supervising the making of lunch one afternoon.
I told Raffi about picking him out of the litter and preparing to bring him home when I was just 22 years old (and felt grown-up enough to commit to a pet, having no idea that he’d be with me for nearly as long as I’d been alive at that point!) I shared hundreds of vignettes: chasing chickens, kitten play dates, harness training, trips to the farmers market, catching mice and a juvenile squirrel, fellow animal and human household companions, garden time, camping trips, snuggling me when I cried, antics and quirks that made us laugh, curling up in the heated sink and later a heated “spaceship,” so many hundred video call cameos, and many more. I talked about all the people who have loved him (especially my niece, his kitty papas, and his aunties).
A walk on the beach on a trip down the California coast last year!
And, of course, I talked about all the places we went together. Raffi he loved riding in the car so we made 4 road trips across the country and countless small excursions. He was the perfect cat for me because he was so adaptable and he even seemed to prefer small living spaces since he liked having everyone within sight or earshot. We moved together 23 times and lived in 18 places. (For those who are curious: 1 RV, 1 yurt, 2 1-bed apartments, 3 ADUs, 4 tiny houses on wheels, and 6 houses!)
Raffi traveled across the country with me and loved checking out new places. And so many new smells and patches of sunshine!
It felt right to make my property in Walla Walla his final resting place. We had lived at Valencia Cottage together longer than anywhere else, in three separate stints. We’d lived in the Lucky Penny together the next longest, at different times and in different locations. Now that these two houses are together (since I made the Lucky Penny an ADU at Valencia Cottage last fall), it felt right to lay him to rest on this land, between these two houses. It was the best homecoming I could give to a cat who was always as up for an adventure as I am. I buried Raffi underneath the apricot tree, which was itself a gift many years ago, from a fellow couchsurfer. It wasn’t until I was midway through digging Raffi’s grave and the apricots were dropping around me that I realized that they too are sweet, soft, orange, and fuzzy. I am glad to have that association now.
Raffi loved the heated sink in T42, so much that I bought him a heated “spaceship” bed once we no longer lived there.
As I’ve been grieving Raffi the past two weeks, it’s been one of those flood-gates events, allowing me to move through some of the grief I hadn’t been able to process before. I’ve been honoring not just this loss, but also other losses I’ve experienced that I didn’t have the space, time, or physical and emotional capacity to fully feel. I’m glad that digging a grave is hard work both physically and emotionally. The soil was rockier than I remembered. It let the grief move through me. The blisters are healing as my heart is healing. And its somehow reassuring that I’ll always have this scar to accompany the memories. There is a Raffi shaped spot in my heart that is reserved especially for him.
Raffi was so great at making me laugh, cheering me up, and being a steady, loving presence.
I’ve often said that if reincarnation is real, I want to come back as my cat. It was a good little life and I’m ever so grateful for it. It’s amazing as I look back through entries in my perpetual journal how often my gratitude was simply “my snuggly lil Roo Cat on my lap!” This funny little cat with a very oversized presence touched the lives of a lot of people and I’m grateful for how many of you have little snippets of his story. I invite you to share any Raffi stories and pictures with me that you’d like to.
*AKA Raffioli, Raffi Roo, Roo, The Rooster, Raffikins, Raffiki, Squeeker, Squeeky Toy, Chirper, Murper, Fuzz Ball, Fuzz Bucket, Fuzzy Monkey, The Fuzz, BEC (Best Ever Cat) , Pineapple Upside Down Cat, Little Dude
Rest in peace, Raffi! You’ll always be loved and missed!